In my work with couples I focus on the deep emotional feelings that each has for the other, both negative and positive. I help partners express these feelings in a way that is productive and loving. I explore with them the themes that run through their interactions. The issues or themes generally come down to one or two and the content is less important than the feelings attached to them.
Relationships bring up our greatest pain. The closer the relationship the greater the pain. It is where emotional overreactions and under reactions are most numerous and where we are most vulnerable. This means it is also where we have the greatest opportunity for growth.
In working with couples I encourage emotional honesty and integrity, which is often very hard to do but has rewards in greater compassion and understanding of the other.
In my work with couples I bring to the sessions my belief in the strong connection between emotional intimacy and sexual intimacy. A strong emotional bond between couples evokes a healthy sexual relationship. As therapy progresses and couples become more closely connected emotionally then their sexual relationship also becomes more satisfying.